Now come on, let's finish tidying you up and go andhave that meal.'In a few minutes, you would not have known that I had a near deathexperience with a pickle. Sheila had gone off with the coat and thencame back with it looking a bit damp, but without any sign of pink. Myhair was neat and tidy and my makeup had been redone to Sheila'ssatisfaction. It was with a lot of trepidation that I left the toiletand walked the three miles to the table in the corner. I looked aroundto see if anyone was laughing at me or ringing the police on theirmobiles. I swear that I saw a baby in a pram with a mobile but that mayhave just been my heightened sense of unreality. I then noticed thatall the faces were different. I then remembered that people neverstayed long in places like that and a whole new load of gulliblepunters had taken the place of the ones that were there when wearrived.We ate our meal in silence. Sheila was too busy filling her face and Iwas looking around furtively to see if I was. Then I was on beastforum and I saw the ad for your show – and bingo, here I am ... Couldn’t resist. I know this’ll change everything. Everyone will treat me different. I’ll have to do things differently.”We cut to a shot of her standing right infront of the doors to her work. The company name/logo perfectly framed behind her but blanked out after we received some strong legal advice.She speaks direct to camera with a quite cheerful tone.‘My name is Nadia Mitrovic and I need to suck and fuck a dog.’And then she turns and almost skips back into work, her round bottom wiggling as she goes. This one is going to be fun!A week later and it’s time for Nadia’s ‘date’. We meet her leaning on the bonnet of her (second hand) BMW, talking direct to camera. She is wearing a white, too-tight t-shirt, and what appears to be a Wonderbra beneath giving her firmer, rounder boobs than before; her skintight blue jeans show off her wide hips (she’s slightly pear shaped), and knee length boots. Her hair.
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