So it was Ruth who was actually the oldest of the three at fifty-five. Sharon was fifty-one, and Angie had just turned forty-nine a month or so back. That the woman sitting in front of me was the oldest of the three surprised me quite a bit. Ruth was one fine looking woman and must have been spectacular in her youth. "Don't you dare tell them I told you!" she laughed.I crossed my heart. Three times. "My lips are sealed. I promise."We sat in silence for a moment as the realization of why we were together began to sink in. We were together for sex. To fuck each other. To enjoy each other. This woman who was thirty-five years older than me. Looking at Ruth, I didn't give a damn about the age difference. She looked all woman and was more than enough for me. I could feel myself beginning to crank up a gear. The old sex drive had gone from first to third in the blink of an eye. Both my hands were on the table and I clasped them together to stop them trembling as the testosterone began to. Maybe he's stealing stuff; maybe he's going to ransack the place while I'm bound and gagged here on the floor. Why not​? It could happen. This is only the second time I've ever met him. By any measure of common sense, even of self-survival, what I'm doing is reckless, stupid, and begging for the kind of disaster that has people shaking their heads and concluding that anyone so reckless, stupid, and looking for trouble deserved what was coming to them.I understand their reasoning. I even agree with them. But I would maintain that they're looking at the situation all wrong.Just the opposite. There seems something entirely ‘right’ about all this, something that I can’t even explain. That's in large part because explanations are always utilitarian, rational, and based on principles of acquisition, self-justification, and the universally agreed upon value of survival. What I'm doing here has nothing to do with any of these sensible daytime pursuits. What I'm doing is gambling everything.
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