I could not talk with the tube in my throat and they relented and removed it so that I could talk. I was so angry about failing to kill myself that I berated every one of those assholes for letting me live so that I could continue to suffer. Over the next several weeks, I had to put up with visits from shrinks that were trying to get me to realize that I did not want to kill myself and that I had a will to survive that would kick in soon. My will to survive had gave up the ghost a long time ago. I tried to tell them that many times but is was all to naught with my efforts. A couple of days after I awoke, I was surrounded by the others in the group but the minute I laid eyes on Jackie, I went berserk. The bitch had no right to come waltzing into my room and life like that and all I could do was scream obscenities at her until she left the room. I hoped that she was crying like the little girl she was! I have never hated anyone in my life like I hated her. Little Miss. I wanted to tease him like he’d teased me.It seemed to be working. He was breathing deeper and making small noises in his throat, still not moving at all other than his fingers, which he moved up and down at the same pace I was moving. Being in control now felt good. I sped up a little and then slowed down a little, sped up, slowed down, and he started using one finger on me instead of two, just barely touching as it moved in tiny circles.I felt his mouth on my shoulder, nibbling at my skin, and I turned my head round to let him kiss my mouth. I had to turn my body a little, but not much, and we kissed slowly and deeply. Just a second after our tongues touched, I felt him spasm inside me, and I thrust myself back onto him hard, pulling him in as deep as he could get. He tried to continue kissing me but his mouth went slack as he moaned. I sucked his tongue and moaned quietly as well, encouraging him.25It was so intense, I wanted to scream. Somehow I managed to just moan, and when I’d.
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