She smiled and turned towards me. I saw that the bouquet was bare of flowers. We hugged, and kissed cheeks. My ex-wife was looking good and had dressed to show off her assets to their best advantage. Not quite as seductively rounded as Laura, she had a fantastic ass, which I had never tired of tanning over the years we were together.'Well, you finally got your gym,' she said, looking round approvingly. 'And the rest,' she said, moving over to the cabinet and opening it. 'Same old toys. Just as well I've brought you a moving in present.'She held out the package. Not flowers, I now saw, but birch twigs tied together at the base. 'They're from Finland or Sweden. Somewhere that knows about such things.'I took the package, unwrapped the paper. The birch twigs were about eighteen inches long and looked as if they would deliver a sting. In my mind, an image of them landing on Laura's rear. 'That's lovely, thank you.'She gave me a look I knew well. 'Lovely? Thank you? What's come over you?. I will not lose my husband because you have an itch. I confine our lovemaking to oral sex on Wednesday. Saturday night, after he has had a day’s rest from work. I allow him to have intercourse with me on top so he doesn’t exert himself too much. So no, there is no time for you.”Then mom brought up her idea of me taking care of Aunt Lois’ needs. “You should have been a little more open to my idea. I know I could have convinced Steve if you had not shut him down so quickly. So what if he is your nephew. He can’t get you pregnant. What the hell, you fuck your brother-in-law. He’s family.”“That’s different, and you know it.”“So you say.”The bickering went on for another week. Dad and I would shake our heads and kept a low profile. Neither of us was going to get in between the two sisters and get blamed again. Dad tried, and Aunt Lois accused him of not being able to control his wife; he was pussy whipped and a few other things until mom came to dad’s defense, and they started in on each.
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