When Susan informed Barry of what she'd done he flew into another rage and Susan left the house again only to come back with a restraining order. Barry had to leave the house and was not allowed to come within one hundred feet of her. Barry made some threats about going public about her "whoring", but she had countered with the information about him that she'd gotten from Harry and in the end she had gotten the house, her car, and fifty percent of their savings and Barry's 401k.Through the whole mess she had talked with John almost daily, but, and this surprised her, she'd not had one word from Harry. She hated to admit it, but she missed the rotten bastard. Her lawyer had advised her to stay away from men until the divorce was final and she had, but today she was free, she was horny and she was desperate to get laid. She reached for the phone with the intention of calling Harry, but as her hand touched it, it rang."Good morning pretty lady" came John's familiar voice. "If my. Everybody at the table was very nice. They talked about me making goodprogress with my transition, and "finally achieving my dreams". Theyhave no idea what I am going through - the pain of being invisible to theman I love.Then, just when I was giving up hope, Scott came out to present some foodand he whispered in my ear: "You look fat". It was a lie and it wasoffensive and hurtful, but all I could think was: "He saw me. He islooking at me. He cares about how I look. I am getting there".Diary Entry 28I just try to keep working. I am good at my job and everybody knows it.I guess I have come to grips with being a woman chef, or more correctly atranswoman chef. I have learned how to smile again.I was worried about my hair and my breasts getting in the way. I havelearned how to tie up my hair in a practical top knot that I think looksquite nice. I have a new tunic which has made room for my expandingchest, and I have discovered the advantage of having a fitted bra withroom for.
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