Perhaps my revulsion to shit had something to do with it.I was proud of myself when the nightmares didn't return after I started a careful regimen, and to top it off, my son seemed to be circulating with girls his own age.If this continued, maybe I'd ask Raymond to spend his next free time out here, with me.Meanwhile, with no sex for weeks, I had to admit I was getting horny, but encouraging Nickie was out of the question, not even on the sly.I was masturbating regularly now, and perhaps Nick had heard some of my moans which I worked hard on reducing to just 'heavy breathing'.On this particularly hot night, and unable to sleep, I got up and first checked the weather channel so I wouldn't get clobbered again!Then, I put on a two piece, flipped on the pool lights, and took a nice midnight dip.It was considerably past midnight, actually, when I began and Nick woke up to 'drain the monster'.After hearing me splash about for a while, I guess he had one of those male moments when he. "Why what’s wrong baby," he asked wondering if he had upset me in some way."Scars, I have too many scars. I'm ugly." I said breathlessly. I didn't want him to see my scars; they were everywhere, just the result of 11 months of hell."Baby, you're beautiful to me. No scar could ever make you ugly to me," he said as he managed to get my shirt off and over my head. It wasn't until he stopped to look down before he realized the extent of the scars. "Baby what happened" he asked with an edge to his voice."An ex boyfriend liked to use me for target practice and his personal punching bag. Don't worry you don't have to take pity on me," I said as I started to push him off of me so that I wouldn't be forced to face his pity.it wasn't seconds before he pulled me back down, looked into my eyes and said the one thing I never expected, "baby what we have is never pity. I care about you, and I’ll kill the bastard that did this to you. You're safe now and I'll wash all the pain and fear away I.
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