I didn’t even know her name. I waved back and hated myself for judging her. I went back inside, switched off the movie, closed the windows, checked everything was in order. I picked up my bag but just as I got to the door, it opened. Lee was home.“Oh, hey,” he said, surprised. He looked at me. “The kids here?”“They just got picked up,” I said. “I’m sorry. It was literally two minutes ago.”He frowned. “Right, of course. I didn’t realise the time.”“I’m sorry,” I said again and he frowned.“Don’t be. It’s my own fault. I said goodbye earlier anyway.”His cell phone rang and he swore under his breath as he searched his pockets before finally finding it. He frowned at the screen before answering and I stood there a little awkwardly, not wanting to eavesdrop. I moved towards the door but he was still holding it half closed and he shook his head ever so slightly like he wanted me to wait.I waited. I tried not to listen to his conversation. I looked at his hand on the door. His fingers. I. As Jude would attest too, the Manifesto also suggested a bad kid can be brought back into the fold in the same way.I would not say that I considered such a thing between Barry and I - but I became more open about the idea, and not so disgusted. The initial shock of what was suggested in the essay had worn off - now I told myself that the woman that had wrote it was so in tune with teenage boys and their single mothers, that I could receive some insight into how best to reach my son. That is not to suggest any inappropriate relationship between us - only that there may be other clues in the well written text.Also, I used the excuse about learning what had gotten into my friend Jude, why she was living a secret sexual life with her only child as well? As a friend, I owed it to learn as much as possible and perhaps guide her away from that evil path. Right?Of course I was simply lying to myself - two weeks after finding the discarded sperm-soaked panty in the wash, I had passed that.
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