They were in Sandy's room with the door shut so I could not hear what they were undoubtedly conspiring. I got the uneasy feeling that somehow I was going to be involved in what they were planning. I had no idea just how much I would be involved.We three spent a nice quite evening watching TV. I thought it a little strange when throughout the movie Sandy and Jean would alternate sitting on my lap and making out. I spent the entire evening hard as a rock. When bed time rolled around I went to my room and got ready to crash for the night. Shortly after I slid between the sheets Jean came into my room. She slid into my bed next to me and we kissed for a while."Greg, Sandy and I had a little chat this afternoon and we decided there is a small problem which needs to be resolved." Whatever it is I'm sure we can work it out. What is the problem?" Well, there is something with Sandy that needs to be fixed."I thought my worst fear was going to be realized. Sandy's cancer had returned and she. "It prevented me from learning to develop relationships with other people. I could make connections with people, but they were always based on my superiority in the connections. People connected with me for what it gave them and I connected for what it gave me. I had control. I had dominance. They had status by virtue of the connection."It made me pathologically selfish. I saw everything and everyone in terms of what was in it for me. I barely recognized there was another side to the equation. And, to take a page from your ubiquitous math analogies, the equation was always an inequality - Ashley is greater than whomever."It denied me the ability to appreciate almost everything. I had almost everything I wanted. I could do whatever I wanted. I could get almost anything I wanted and I never had to make much of an effort for any of it. How could I value anything when it came so effortlessly?"Look at all the work you did for me in high school and it cost me nothing. My grades cost me.
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