" Oh babe, I'm sorry." It wasn't your fault." Well, in a way it is. If I hadn't called to joke with you it wouldn't have happened." Joke with me?" Yeah sweetie, I'm not in the lobby. I'm calling from Charlotte. I did have to change planes in Atlanta and I was going to surprise you, but I couldn't get a flight out in the morning early enough to get me here for my meeting so I couldn't stop over." Oh gee honey, and you had me thinking I was going to get laid tonight instead of watching the dumb stuff on TV." Maybe I'll surprise you the next time. Hey, got to run. Here comes the hotel shuttle bus. I'll talk to you later sweetie. Love you." I love you too Rob. Bye."I at least had the pleasure of knowing that I'd almost given Tricia and her asshole lover heart failure.During my time in Charlotte and on the trip home I thought about how I would take my revenge. I rolled a dozen plots and scenarios over in my mind and one by one I discarded them as either impractical or too hard to make. At least until you get tired of us. Believe me when I say this, Gabs, you are welcome here forever if that’s what works best for you, alright? Do you need help to go pee, or anything else? I already installed your seat on the head, like you said, so you won’t fall in.’ I put her down in the little purple wheelchair, and she fastened her hip belt and then made her way quickly around the room, her floppy hand dangling as she pushed the rim with her wrist. She found her duffel, and began to unpack. ‘We are just down the hall, so if you need anything, just yell, and we’ll come for you.’ I bent to give her a hug, and after she kissed my cheek, she stroked it with her limp fingers and said, ‘Thanks, David, you guys are lifesavers, and I am so happy to be here.’ ‘We’re happy to have you. Sleep tight.’ I brushed my teeth and crawled into bed beside my girl. I once saw a quote, and it came to me now. ‘I have heard the Eskimo have a hundred words for snow, and that the Egyptians have fifty.
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