“Last night was a terrible night. You received terrible news. You were told someone you loved had cancer.”“We discussed this before,” she said. “Carl and I have never been in love. We have deep affection for each other and respect between us, but not love.”“That’s not what I meant,” I told her. “You thought he was telling you I was dying before we figured out what you were thinking and corrected that.”She looked extremely uncomfortable with the tone the conversation was taking and seemed to struggle for a way to turn it aside from disaster.“I can imagine you feel a lot of things right now. Devastation. Carl is your mentor, just as I’ve come to see him as mine. Relief. You thought that the tests had picked up cancer and I was going to die. Guilt. You don’t feel as crushed at his death as you were at the thought of my death. Shame. As long as you’ve known him, you feel like he deserves more of your grief than that.”“You DO spend too much time with me,” she said, her voice choked with. Tears formed in her eyes and ran in unnoticed rivulets down her cheeks. Donnie's voice, now:"DAMN, SIS... YOU'VE GOT THE SWEETEST, TIGHTEST LITTLE CUNT I'VE EVER SEEN!"Dear God! This isn't the first time for Donnie! He's so young! It doesn't seem possible that he could have had sex relations already!"OOOOOH! DON! DON! DONNIE!"Charity's voice was so full of rapturous passion, a passion that Dottie, herself, knew well... and she couldn't bear to hear any more. She fled. Blinded by her tears and hampered by the darkness, she made her stumbling way back to her own bedroom and sat down, heavily, on the edge of her bed.Suddenly, she felt old... drained. All of the cares of the world, of mankind, it seemed, rested square on her shoulders. She didn't know how she could bear that heavy burden. The one overriding thought in her mind was that she had failed... failed as a wife, a mother... perhaps even, as a human being. It was too complicated to sort out aH of the reasons why she felt that way..
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