And that leads me into Chapter 2!II. Household Objects.AT ONE POINT in almost everyone's life, something utterly stupid happens. True Story. London, England; A girl happens to be drying off from a shower when her telephone rings. In her bed, where said telephone is, there also is a bottle of ladies spray-on aerosol perfume. Said bottle is about an inch to an inch and a half in diameter, and about five to seven inches tall, and this bottle is standing on the bed. Said girl happens to run into the bedroom, jump onto the bed, and gets the bottle cap lodged five to seven inches up her pretty pink puss box, and now has to come see me in the hospital because she just so happened to land on it. Hmmm ... As Ripley's says it, 'Believe it or Not!'(see efukt.com, "Stories of Sexual Fail")Then there is the not so popular Light Bulb! (This trick is not to be tried by anyone who body builds!)I happened to personally go through this endeavor. I was in my office doing some paperwork at the end of a. I stopped by Tami's house about three and was told to "Buzz off!"Whatever they did, it worked. Robbie always looked good at the dances with her long hair cascading down her shoulders and back, but somehow her shorter hair accented her body more. She was beautiful, though I refused to tell her just how good she looked. I wouldn't want her getting the idea I approved of her haircut.Tami looked good to me even when she had the flu, so it wasn't hard to look beautiful in her new dress. But it was Kelly that amazed me. She didn't look like a seventh grader. She was wearing one of Tami's old dresses, and she looked like she belonged at a high school dance.I walked in the dance with Kelly on one arm and Tami on the other, and they both got the stares they deserved. I thought I'd take some flack for bringing a seventh grader—you know, cradle robber, that sort of thing—but nobody said anything. I don't think anyone realized her age, at least not at first.Several guys came over and wanted to.
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