After school I ran. Any homework I didn’t finish during study hall had to be completed as soon as I got home, before the meds started wearing off. The meds started wearing off around seven or so. At that point I would become lethargic, then ravenously hungry, then totally exhausted. After a huge supper I would crash hard, sometimes barely able to make it to my room. My life became a routine, dictated by my meds. Any deviation from my routine, any unexpected interference caused me to miss my evening meal or become agitated. Dan learned not to include me in evening plans if he wanted to take mom out to dinner or to the movies. My mom was coping with her loss much better, but she also had been prescribed anti-depressants since the wreck. Dan couldn’t understand why she still needed to take them, when she had him to ease the pain. He resented her need to take the pills, assuming it meant she still ached for her dead husband. Truth is, she still did feel the pain of loss every day, but. .. I... I know what people say. I see how people look at me. I know the rumors. But I don’t really do that. I’ve never fucked a boy from school. Never. The only people I fuck...”Her voice trailed off, not finishing the sentence. When she spoke again she was more composed. “Please Dave. You’re a good guy. I know you are. Please just help me. Just this once, OK? I’m trying to kick my habit. Really. I’m going to go back to NA. I just need this bag to get right for now, ya know? I’ll pay you back after I get a job next month, I swear!”Jesus, it was delicious watching and listening to her struggle with her demons as she stood there clutching the bag. I drank in her desperation and humiliation in like a man dying of thirst. When I stepped forward and grabbed the bag away from her she screamed and lunged at me. I held it up just out of her reach as she danced around trying to grab it, then backhanded her hard and sent her sprawling. As she lay there on the ground dazed I put a foot on her.
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