This was impossible. Rape hadlongentered her mind. To her, that was now inevitable, but to have her acceptsucha degrading role was beyond her.The old man moved closer to her and started to kiss her. She let his tongueenter her mouth, but did nothing in return. She closed her eyes, as she felthis hands lowering her panties. She waited for the inevitable penetration, butit never came, and she felt him walk away from her.She heard him on the phone. "Uh-huh ..yeah ..The fucking bitch is here. ...Yeah come on over later .. I'm putting you on speaker phone."A loud muffled voice could be heard. It sounded like someone in extremepain.Jeannie recognized the voice immediately, and lunged at the phone, butbeforeshe could say anything, Uncle Billy had cut off the call. He looked at her andsmiled. A small rivulet of tears ran down her cheeks."Kiss me," said the old man.Jeanne complied. Locking her soft lips against his rough chapped ones. Hertongue responded this time. She hated the beard. Ruffled feathery god-knows-whats! No more of those granny undies for her, anymore! Anything for more toothpasty kisses! But nothing seemed to break the spell. He just grew colder, meaner and more distant. SEX — that word became a part of someone else’s life, not hers, as she stayed up nights in her new bedroom and old study trying to think of how to go on. Sometimes, when she was really low, she slept on the warm rug with a blanket, next to the fire, and imagined people who slept on rugs next to fires but who actually made love. How she wished she could be one of them… It amazed her how bad her luck had been. After all, everyone else she knew had families — had love. As she wept, she was sure Matt could hear none of her crying, however. HE was probably in deep sleep, happily carrying on with his life, because that’s what he was: HAPPY. That’s what he had told her, anyway. Ever since she had moved to the study on her own volition, he had announced how happy and free and accomplished.
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