When she’d tried to tell people about David… about the clothing she wore for him, the things she did to him- to herself- to give him pleasure, they had backed uneasily away, or scratched it down on their office pad and gave her more pills. How alone she always felt after an altercation with Jason. As though she’d never feel him again. This was another of those alones. Perhaps, in at least one odd sense if irony, Ren *wasn’t*, alone, however. Just a wall away, Jason brooded silently on his couch, a lukewarm beer in hand. It was some nerve she had, all but shooing him out to take the damn test… and then blowing him off, not so much as a call or a text one way or the other? What was it with women- no, what was it with Ren? Jason had given her ample time, too. He’d worked out, jogged, gotten some work done down at the office, and done just about everything he could think of to soak up the time Ren wanted for herself. What if she’d split, what if it was positive, what if, what if… so. I unrolled my sleeping bag, threw my stuff on it, and I was unpacked. I stepped out of the tent, and there was Sam.“Go for a walk, Buddy?”“Sure.”We didn’t have to be back until late in the afternoon. Mom and Dad had told us we could go anywhere we liked as long as we didn’t bother anyone. Without saying anything, I took Sam’s hand. On the far side of the ridge above our tents a grassy meadow sloped down to a shallow lake. We went down from the ridge a little, over near some trees, where there were some rocks warm from the sun to rest against. We sat beside each other, toying with long stems of grass. After a while, Sam spoke first.“I’m sorry about the other day.”She studied her grass stem.“Sorry about what?”“Crying.”“Sam, why?”“Look, Buddy. I know we love each other. We’re friends, right? Except I know I love you more than that.”“I know.”“I know we can’t be boyfriend and girlfriend. I don’t care. I don’t want to keep you to myself. I love you, that’s all.”Another silence.“You’re the.
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