I just enjoyed when someone was looking at me. My younger brother was peeking at me frequently, beneath the table and even through my bedroom door - but I didn't encourage him even while still enjoying his desire. With three boyfriends by the time I was nineteen, the only three men I have been intimate with to that point, I left home after my step-father's interest turned into pawing of my breasts when mom's back was turned. Years later, I can confess it wasn't his interest that bothered me so much as my betrayed of my mother - I could not stay and trust myself.I worked a handful of menial jobs before finding a full-time position at a large factory as a secretary. There was nearly a hundred guys working there and only three women - a girl about twenty five, some old grandmother-type and me. Well that older girl and I hit it off, laughing with pleasure as the men whistled and made rude remarks, feeling their eyes like a physical touch as we walked across the floor. We even moved in. My Dad is not as handsome as Phil. He isn’t as sweet and child-like either. He is probably more analytic and serious than Phil but in a way they do look similar. Dad is however kind of a push over and a little on the shy side like Phil. I suppose that I favor him in a lot of ways but I was starting to channel some of my mother’s take-charge attitude.“Mom, can we go get something to eat?” would have been met with a response like “We are all about to eat as a family. Stay for the party!” from her.I said “Mom, we are going to get something to eat,” and she didn’t challenge it at all. I was amazed. What a difference a few words make.I think also what a difference a few glasses of wine and a couple of margaritas make because she had mellowed out quite a bit!Whatever the reason, I was able to leave the cabana again with Hayden and Waverly. My cousin Junior insisted on tagging along which if I was in his shoes I would have done the same thing so I really couldn’t blame him.Marlene had.
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