I wanted it bad. Very bad.I felt him thrust harder until I felt like my hole was being ripped in two. The pain was mind- numbing as he slipped in about an inch. I had immediate second thought. He held me tight, and then slowly worked the rest in until I could feel his pubic hair on my ass. I froze, in pain, but also in total lust. He was inside me, and I could feel him throb in my ass. He slowly moved out, then in, until the burn was giving way to profound pleasure. He didn't pound me, and started jacking me again, rubbing his hands all over me. I was invaded now. I felt like I was a part of Greg, and he, a part of me.He started moving faster and I started squirting spontaneously. My balls just emptied, shooting wildly, everywhere. My erection didn't go down, and he continued to jack me. I felt him getting larger, and suddenly he hugged me so tight I could hardly breathe as I felt him throb, with a deep feeling of wetness inside, lubricating us, which I knew had to be his. The first of these steps would be to again go into counseling. This time I needed someone more understanding and sympathetic to my intentions.My problem was that I was that woman in the mirror. However it had happened, I had been born with the wrong gender. She was what I should have been and what I had to be, to become whole and content with myself and my life. Anything less was insufficient.Playing the part, without the intentions of actually becoming what I needed to be, should have been, was only self-abuse. That is why, I perceived the young woman in Janice's mirror, to be mocking me.It's a difficult decision to make, to change one's life so entirely. For many an even harder decision than mine was.I could, of course, question my mother's and Janice's influence on me. That I had been indoctrinated, into believing, that I would be better off female than male.Still, a lot of how we feel about our selves is dictated by how others feel and act towards us. That was the argument that I.
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