She knew this and was supporting me. Later i came to know that she is in love with me. I felt bad for her as i loved my ex-gf and she is in love with me. I had warned her that i won’t be able to love anyone as my heart is completely broken.But she did not understand. So i had to tell her on her face that don’t fall in love with me. I will not love u nor i will marry u. She was ok with that. She was also ditched by her bf which i came to know during this time. I tried my level best to recover from this depression and tried different things like visiting temples, orphanages, old age homes, helping others, movies,etc. but could not recover. Suddenly one day i got a thought that why not i do something that would help me. I thought for different options but could not find a suitable options.Suddenly one day it came to my mind that my depression is because i was in real love with her and she betrayed me. So i thought why not i have affair with someone and get over my ex-gf. During this. Kids, advancing careers, travelling jobs, all came and went. The urge to dress remained. When the urge would hit me, it was truly an obsession! As time would pass, the desire to dress would increase. Eventually becoming the predominant thought that passed through my mind during the day. Unless I was extremely busy designing or trouble shooting something I thought about going home and slowly sliding on a pair of panties, then pantyhose, hooking a bra and filling the cups, finally putting on a dress and heels. This was strange, because a great sense of relief would occur at this point of the transformation. The makeup and wig were not ALWAYS needed to satisfy the obsession! Life continues and careers change. As those of you that attended my 'author's chat' know, I now own my own business. This brings on a myriad of responsibilities and pressures that I never knew about before. Those pressures seemed to be the trigger for increased frequency of wanting to dress. I spent many a lunch hour.
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