The bruised nerd returned followed by this large, overweight troll who seemed to have inherited the house. He was sort of a overweight bearded Cyber-Fagin, Cali-style, wearing a faded rock t-shirt (Kinks + Blondie ‘76, he looked like he was there) and ripped surf shorts. He took one look at me, my muscles were pumped from hefting the damn big computer, and put his hands up in the classic “don’t want no trouble here” position.“Chief, are you taking the girl? That’s cool, whatever you like. Maybe there are some things the others have borrowed from her, you can go through their stuff if you want.” I shifted to look at the guy who complained. Troll took the hint. “Okay Wiretop, you are expelled for 5 days. How dare you bother the Chief here? Pack up!”The herd of pale-skinned nerds complained. First they whined about how the house was a “No Weapon Zone.”The Boss answered. “That rule applies to nobs, not a Chief like this who knows one end of a gun from the other, and was only likely to. He told me to get off the plane or he’d kick my butt.”“So, did you jump?”“No. He tried to push me out of the plane but I grabbed onto the door and refused to go. Finally, he called over the Jump Master. The Jump Master is this great big guy about six-foot six, and 280 pounds. He said to me, ‘Are you gonna jump or not?’ I said, ‘No sir, I’m too scared.’ So, the Jump Master pulled down his zipper and took out his Johnson. I swear, Mom, it was about ten inches long and big around as a baseball bat! He said, ‘Either you jump out that door or I’m sticking this bad boy right up your ass.’”“So, did you jump?” asked her mother.“A little at first.”Today is my baby girl’s 18th birthday. I be so glad that this be my last child support payment! Month after month, year after year, all those payments!So I call my baby girl, LaKeesha, to come to my house, and when she get there, I say: “Baby girl, I want you to take this check over to yo momma house and tell her this be the last check she ever be.
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