Dave had one hundred and seventy-yards to the pin. He decided that his eight-iron would not be enough so he selected his seven iron as his father described the green. Dave listened carefully then stood over his ball ready to take a little off the seven-iron. He aimed just right of the pin and hit the ball perfectly. The ball sailed over the pin and stopped twelve feet past the hole. Dave happily handed his club to his father and strode towards the green. The Manitoba player chipped and two putted for bogey before the Quebec player rolled his first putt four feet past the hole. Dave and his father lined up his putt and talked about the slight right to left break. When they were both happy with the line, Dave stood over the putt and stoked the ball smoothly. The ball rolled towards the right side of the hole and held the line for a long time until it suddenly caught the top lip of the hole and dropped in. Dave mentally said, "Good start, Dave!" but on the outside he looked almost. Think again china! I never knew that I could run in water or maybe I was running ON water I am not sure! As I hit the bank, putting the ‘Roadrunner’ way behind me I scurried up a tree quicker than any ape; I am almost certain that tree was planted as a blessing for me in anticipation of this day. With my heart beating faster than Ginger Baker could produce a drum roll and perched almost at the pinnacle of the tree, I could only watch as the huge angry a****l fortunately halted at the bank and brutally bewailed his demented fury as the leaves on the tree visibly shook….not too sure if it was from me or the T-Rex! Immediate thoughts came to mind of a rather gooey, pungent and lumpy fluid running down my legs that had been hastily and uncontrollably emitted from my rectal orifice with the sphincter gland well exceeding its human anatomical parameters! …. Although undoubtedly imminent, fortunately this did not occur. In retrospect, looking down the barrel of 10 tons of terrifying.
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