. can you hear me when I don't speak?" Caleb thought the question hesitantly, fearing that he wouldn't get an answer, and fearing that he would, too."Yes, I can hear you. You are worried about your ... sanity is your term for an acceptable state of mind. You don't need to worry. You are rational, and from your frame of reference it is normal to be concerned for your sanity. " What ... Who ... what are you," Caleb thought suspiciously, but concerned about offending something inside his headHe had to fight the panic that threatened to overwhelm him. Caleb had learned to control his fear. That skill was one of the most important lessons that he had learned in the Army. Normally, it was simply a matter of acknowledging the fear, and it's source. Then he could proceed to eliminate or marginalize the source of the fear. In this case, all he could do was try to understand the source of the fear."The nearest description that I can find in your memories, would be a parasite, but that isn't. On Wednesday, I called Karin to wish her an early happy birthday, and ensure that she’d received the card and small gift that I’d sent her. We talked about the February trip, but I could sense that she wasn’t sure about making it.“I’m torn,” she said. “I want to see you and be with you, but I know you’re still thinking about Kara. And she’s coming to be with you in the Summer, and you’re bringing her to Sweden with you. I just don’t know. You know what I want, and I had hoped you would eventually want the same thing. But I wonder if that will ever happen.”“I can’t promise you anything at all at this point,” I said. “Kara and I aren’t getting engaged, but we’ll be living together and, I think that in the end, we’ll stay together.”“I know. Before, I thought maybe something would change, but now I’m not so sure. If I came to Chicago, it would be to say ‘goodbye’, I guess.”She sounded sad and resigned. I felt terrible, but I didn’t see what else I could do.“It’s up to you, Karin. I still.
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