That was her pet name for our second son Paul, the son that we had lost in Afghanistan eight years ago. He had been in an unarmored vehicle in a UN convoy travelling to help people in a remote village, when an IED had been detonated by the Taliban, destroying the vehicle and killing all in it. Paul’s death had been a major shock to both of us, but for her it was a devastating blow, one that she was destined not to get over. Ever since Paul had joined the UN team In Kabul she had believed that somehow the Taliban would not target or harm them because they were helping the Afghan people. Though I can’t be sure, deep in my heart I believe that somehow, the loss of Paul was partly responsible for the deterioration in her, the deterioration that I had been watching over the past few years. To me it was no surprise that the Taliban would hurt a team trying to help their people, I had long since realized that fundamentalist Muslims were not to be trusted, any more than fundamentalists of. He had opened the door and stared at her with those red eyes that were so typical of a stoner. It had made her even angrier. She had given him a piece of her mind, and as she had felt the fury and seen his fear, she had become aware of another sensation deep inside of her. A thrill which made her realize that, as angry as she was, she also enjoyed wielding her power over him. Strange, perhaps, and maybe even worrisome, but there it was.It had happened more than once too. She had felt it when she denied some of his requests, and she had felt it when she told him to pick up the joint from underneath the table. Oh, and she had certainly felt it when he had said those stupid, misogynistic things and they had ended up wrestling in the grass. At first, she had just played with him, confident that she could easily beat him. But when he had gone out of line and tried to trick her, she had felt her anger rise and with it came that strange thrill that made her want to dominate him. He had.
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