He then poured a second and come and stood before me, leaning on the bar, a sympathetic grin on his face."Had a bad day, sport?" he asked, taking a gulp of his beer and wiping the froth from his moustache with the back of one hand."Not particularly. It has just been one hell of a mediocre life," I replied, mirroring his drinking."Go on then, let it out. While I promise no solutions, I am a hell of a good listener." Well," I began, and then paused. My problems were pretty weak, when I tried to think of a way to voice them. It isn't like I have cancer or anything. I sighed again, what harm could it do? "Today is my birthday"."Happy birthday, sport," he said, and clinked his glass into mine."Thanks. I just turned twenty-two years old. Twenty two and..." Here goes, time to admit the embarrassing part. "I am twenty two and I haven't even been kissed yet." I took a long drink from my beer so I could hide my shame. Most guys my age had boned god-knows how many girls by now, and I hadn't. A more perfect pair of evil little shits you couldn't imagine." "Ah, well, I am something of an expert on evil shits." That drew a huge and genuine laugh. "You see, this is why I like you. You're too clever to do this, you know, you should be using that mind of yours." "I just made two thousand quid for, what, forty minutes work?" "I make that, about, too, but for me it's twenty four seven." "Yeah. Plus, you don't have people literally shitting on you." "Exactly!" She grinned. He wasn't all that bad. He was leaning against the tiled wall now, ogling her soapy body, now, finally, free of shit. "So you're saying I still have twenty minutes left on the clock?" She looked down. The old beast was rearing up again. "You going to need all of it?" "Well, if we run over time I'm sure there's a way to compensate you." "I'm certain of that. How do you want to do it this time?" "Oh, just hands and knees, no need to get complicated." She rolled her eyes, but came down, moving out of the.
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