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We met in a pub, and he wanted to drink my piss right there at the table, first time I met him! So he finished his beer, I took the glass into the ladies room, filled it up, snuck it back to the table and put it in front of him. I raised my glass in a toast, and then he drained his! Just tilted it and guzzled it, right in front of everybody! That was really, really exciting, but yeah, he was weird. He was into poop and diapers and all sorts of things. So it never really went anywhere past that." Oh my God, that's so amazing!" said Marion, wide-eyed. "You met him through that website?" Yep. Lots of really older guys on that website into that though, kinda creepy. They want you to dress up in schoolgirl uniforms and stuff. So that's the only guy I met in person that I really did anything with."I sat there, trying to look calm while my pulse was racing a mile a minute. My rigid erection strained against my trousers as I tried to subtly conceal it, wondering how long it was going to be. Do you eat this well all the time?’ ‘Sure.’ She ducked her head like she had a big dirty confession to make. ‘I love to cook. I know I’m probably not supposed to admit it because it makes me sound like some throwback to the 1950’s, but it’s the truth.’ ‘Hey listen,’ I raised my hand, ‘your secret’s safe with me. Of course it’ll cost you a plate or two of linguini now and then, and the occasional pot roast, but my silence comes pretty cheap.’ ‘What, no cheesecake?’ She shot back. ‘It’s my specialty.’ I sank to my knees and raised my clasped hands to my chest. ‘Well damn, in that case, I think you’ll have to marry me to guaranty my silence.’ Amy turned white. Oh shit, if I knew Amy, she was now worried that being here with me was in some way cheating on Liam. Which of course made no sense, seeing as how he was probably already out with Betty Boop wearing one each of my two best pairs of socks. I decided it would probably not be in my stomach’s best interest to point this out to her.
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