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“Must be a little nervous, I guess,” I brushed her hair back and forced a grin, “This kinda is my first date.”“Don’t be nervous,” She stopped me in front of the big window. There were movie posters plastered up but you could see in or out if you wanted to, “But you better kiss me good night here. Don’t want to rile up the parents too badly, right?”“Right,” I grabbed her face and kissed her lightly. She grabbed around my waist and pulled herself in tighter. I broke the kiss before she was ready, “Let’s get you home.”“Dude, it’s hardly 10! Dork!” My sister’s voice carried her laugh at me from deep into our home. I kicked off my shoes.“Hey, yeah, I guess I’ll have to wait until--” I came to a hard stop when I saw Xiomara waiting in our living room. She was dressed in a low cut green top and skin tight jeans. She chewed the bottom left corner of her lip until we made eye contact. She had a brilliant smile.“Wait until what?” Xiomara smirked as her eyes glittered with curiosity. I wasn’t. She had saved herself for me all this time, and then had been violated by another. She was a virgin that had been raped, her virginity stolen, just as surely as if she had never known a man before. In this case, I think it was worse.I didn't know how to deal with this. I was not a woman, had never been raped, had never lost my virginity to a rapist. I knew intellectually how she felt, but I had no idea in reality. To me, everything I could say was the equivalent of patting her on the back and saying 'Now, now, honey, it will be all right', when she knew damned well it would not be all right. The only thing I could do was be there and let her know I loved her. Right now, short term, it just wasn't nearly enough. She needed a daddy, who would be her hero, the man who made the monsters go away, the one that could do anything she needed done. For once in my life, I didn't know how to do that. I couldn't make the monsters go away. All I could do was be there to patch up her wounds after.
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