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”One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very sexy nightie. “Tie me up,” she purred, “and you can do anything you want.” So he tied her up and went golfing.A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, “Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!” The husband said, “Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?” “Doesn’t matter,” she said. “Just get out.”A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver’s license. First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician showed him a card with the letters: ‘C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.’ “Can you read this?” the optician asked. “Read it?” the Polish guy replied, “I know the guy.”Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, “I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent.” “Thank God,” said an elderly nun at the back. “I’m so tired of chardonnay.”A. ?Don't get clever with me, I can see that, when are they coming back?? She shrugged. ? Monday, I think, they've gone away for the weekend.? An idea began to form in Geraldine's mind, and as she took the informationin she took another look at the girl, slim, pretty with shoulder length hair,16 the arrest form had said. Geraldine's sexual instincts began to stir, andthough this one was a bit younger than she would normally go for this mightbe too good an opportunity to miss. Geraldine broke the silence in the room. ?What do you think they'll do when they find out about your thieving?? Julia cringed visibly. ?Christ, kill me probably.? Bingo, Geraldine thought, now to move in. ?Well, there might be a way of makingsure they don't find out.? As she said this Geraldine moved close to Juliaand lifted her face with her hand. The girl looked puzzled and afraid. ?What do you mean?? ?Well, you're a pretty young thing If you let me have some fun with you, there'sno reason you're parents need.
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