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‘I always knew you had a thing for me.’ Meg scoffed and flipped her hair over her shoulder, even though he couldn’t see the dismissive gesture. ‘Don’t flatter yourself, bonehead.’ ‘Bite me.’ Meg laughed. They talked on the phone for another few minutes before hanging up. After the conversation, Meg turned off the TV, knowing she couldn’t avoid packing anymore. She hadn’t been lying when she’d told Zane about packing her kitchen stuff. She didn’t have a lot but now that she was moving out of state, it seemed like she had far too much. With a sigh, she poured herself a fresh tea and started to load one of the boxes. **** ‘Is she hot?’ Zane narrowed his eyes at his teammate before switching knees and stretching his other leg. ‘What?’ Mike Forsythe gave Zane an innocent shrug and grinned. ‘How would you like it if I asked if your sister is hot?’ Mike shrugged again and then lifted his stick over his head to stretch. ‘I’d probably tell you to shove it.’ ‘Exactly.’ ‘I’m not asking about. She saw it the next day. She was hurt but my plan failed. I know that was ridiculously stupid. The shame you feel after hurting yourself to cope is difficult to deal with and I’ll be honest and say that the shame sometimes made me feel so bad that I actually harmed myself twice in the space of a few minutes. The term vicious cycle has been used to describe self-harm. I completely agree. It’s exactly the right term to use. You feel bad, you cut. You feel bad about cutting, you start to feel worse. And you cut again. And it keeps on going, and going, and going... It’s very hard to explain and incredibly difficult for people to comprehend but hurting yourself is very addictive. I have no idea why but that’s the only word that I can find to at least try to explain. People often mistake is as a suicide attempt but that’s just because the most common place to cut is arms. It’s not about dying, it really isn’t. It can be a cry for help but for most it’s to help cope with.
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