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Are you comfy and cozy, sweetie?" shesays. "I just need to use this thing for a moment before I go out forthe night." Joan sits down on the toilet seat and shits on my face. They arebig solid turds and she takes her time about it, chatting idly with meas she goes about her business. "I've got a date tonight with the fellow who made this thing forme," she says. "I think I'll bring him back to the house and get areally good fucking for once. I just hope he has to take a crap beforethe night is through. I'd love to have him try out his own workmanshipwith you lying under the toilet so he can appreciate its' value." "How long are you going to keep me in here?" I ask. "As long as I feel like it," she says. "I don't have to worryabout you getting hungry. I know how much you enjoy eating my shitanyway, and there'll be plenty of it for you to eat from now on." "Tomorrow, I'll get the hose and let you clean up this mess forme," she continues. "I'm sure the neighbors will enjoy. I love my mother, but she still thinks of me as her little boy, her child prodigy, and if I let her, she would be up my ass, in my business all the time. This is the reason I do not live at home; not since my freshman year. Living in the dorms during undergrad, and now in an apartment with three other guys was my feeble attempt at being an adult.That thought made me chuckle. Me, an adult! Ha! I still go home when I can no longer take the cheap, meager food I subsist on. The only time I ate well was on a modeling assignment, all first class restaurants and hotels. I resolved to do better, at least try, after this last mountain of laundry was done.The salon where I go to get my hair trimmed was busy. Since I had no appointment, I had to wait. The receptionist told me they had a special on pedicures and there was an open chair if I wanted one while I waited. Oh, hell, why not? I was taken to a comfortable chair, where an Asian lady was waiting for her next customer.In her broken.
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