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I not lethargic but I can’t seem to gather enough energy to break past the barrier. I know it sounds weird, but it’s the only way I know to explain it. I’ll be off the old med in another day or two so we’ll see if that helps. I’m treating myself to a CBD day. I want some quiet in my head for once. I have to let the new medicine establish a baseline so after today no CBD for about 2 weeks. Then I plan to never be without again.It’s hard to start the rebooting process in my current situation. I had given up. No one could or would give me any objective information on my condition and all subjective information indicated I was going downhill with no way to slow it down. Well, the subjective information was correct to a point, My speech is deteriorating slowly, but it is my mental and emotional state that was going to hell in a hand basket due to the physical pain and all the stress from the fallout of being sick.Now, that I know what to target I can devise strategies including. I knew exactly who it was because he types like he talks. Since he stubbornly refused to admit who I thought he was, I made it equally as tough for him to figure out who I was. Because the school was so small, he eventually narrowed it down to about five possible students. At this point, I admitted my identity......But the old bastard didn't keep his promise! To this, he acclaims that he feared losing his job; I guess I can understand that. I knew damn well who it was but I still needed to hear it from his face. He was my favorite teacher and I had him for two classes. I'd shoot a teasing glance at him whenever I got the chance. It was pretty fun relationship even before we ever had sex, I must admit.The day finally came--I sat alone at one of his tables while the rest of the school was at a mandatory assembly (I never much liked following the rules). He approached and revealed that he was my online penpal. All I did was smile and say, "I knew it."The paranoid old man still refused.
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