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Checked out her car, and couldn't help checking out the beautiful owner and would be motorist beside it looking flustered. I gave the ailing auto my best imitation of a once over and offered my grim conclusion, "I think you are going to need a tow" and called a tow truck. She was a damsel in a dress, and I had helped solve her distress. She stood 5 foot 4 inches, small perky breasts clinging to her American Apparel T Shirt, through some divine lacy creation doing its imitation of a bra. Her hips curved out and around, two bubbles of perfection rounded out her delightful posterior. Full pouty lips turned down in seductive dismay. And then she looked up at me, into what seemed my very soul, and pierced her way through to my heart, on a return trip from my nether regions. Green eyes pinned me dreamily to this very spot on the earth. I dared not move for fear of destroying the perfection of this moment.We made small talk, and caught each other smiling back and forth with our. Just pace yourself, make sure you have plenty of stops and try to stay on a soft surface like grass or a path." Gentlemen, remember -- you're in this together. It wouldn't hurt you to go walking with her. In fact, that shared experience would be good for you both."The room suddenly became very quiet as the men absorbed this vital information. After a few moments a man, name unknown, at the back of the room, slowly raised his hand."Yes?" said the Instructor."I was just wondering if it would be all right, if she carries a golf bag while we walk?"This one is compliments of patThere was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.The letter read:Dear God,I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension.Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I.
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