One asks the other: “And how’s your sex life”?“Same As Coca-Cola”“Oh great! ... Full of bubbles, eh?”“Nothing like that! Before it was ‘CLASSIC’, then it became ‘LIGHT’ and now it is ‘ZERO’!✧ ✧ ✧These are compliments of dorsetmike‎Japanese tourist in London, very annoyed at the daily changes in the Yen-Pound Sterling exchange rate :Japanese tourist, to bank cashier : “Why evvy time I come here the rate different?”Bank cashier : “Fluctuation.”Japanese tourist : “Fluck you too, European!”There was a musican called Gager Who, as the result of a wager, Consented to fart The whole oboe part Of Mozart’s Quartet in F majorI was reading an article on Gandhi recently. I never realised that he had very bad breath. Also, he had huge callouses on his feet because he never wore shoes. And his general health was very bad.In fact, you could say he was a super-calloused fragile mystic cursed by halitosis.Have you heard the one about the agnostic dyslectic insomniac?He lay awake all night wondering if. There was no way all that concrete would completely disappear. So, if not forward in time, did we go back in time? And, if so, how far? I turned 180 degrees, looked out over the valley, and had a funny feeling. I squatted down next to Bo, “It sure looks different from this perspective, doesn’t it?” Not being up high and overlooking the trees, the valley looked somehow different than looking at it through the trees from the slope. However, if I had learned anything in my wilderness adventures, it was how confusing surrounds can appear depending on your perspective. Once in the trees, it is easy to become disoriented and glimpses of distant views can give very misleading impressions.Survival. All my training for survival experience kicked in. I never thought I would actually have to depend on it to live, I thought it was a challenge I gave myself, an exercise to force me to not become complacent in life and my independence. Bo and I found ourselves in a place we didn’t know.
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