Dad was saying something in the background, but there weren’t any words. There was only noise.Liz was clutching my hand. She was looking deeply into my eyes. She was looking straight through my eyes, right into the middle of my head, trying to see all the mess that was in there. She obviously felt responsible. She was feeling guilty for making the mess. It wasn’t her fault; the mess was already there. All she did was shine a light into my head so that everyone could see it. It was such a bright and glaring light. I blinked my eyes; trying to adjust.Liz was talking to me, asking a question, but there weren’t any words. There was only noise.Her searchlight beamed in through my eyes, lighting up all the dark corners of my brain. It lit up ideas and thoughts and feelings and experiences and emotions that I hadn’t ever processed. They were all piled up in forgotten corners, gathering dust until Liz shone her light onto them. It was too much! I wasn’t ready to see those things yet. I wasn’t. He got rid of the midwife after the second month as the twins were strong enough to be on their own.The car horn startled me as I stared blankly into space. I had been distracted thinking about momma and the babies still at home with that monster and his asshole friends. They practically live there now providing full time care and full time abuse to Dawn. I hadn't seen them doing anything to the twins yet, but I'm not there most of the time."How much?" he man called out as I stepped closer to the car."Whatcha lookin' for?" I asked in my best dumb-blond voice, smacking gum like a true street whore should. I learned a long time ago that guys seem to get off on that, seeing a teenage girl noisily chewing gum while whoring herself out on the streets. It also helps after countless blowjobs to cover the taste and smell of cock and cum."Half and half," he called out meaning he wanted me to suck him and then he wanted to fuck me. That's a common request."Hundred for half an hour," I called.
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