I just…oh God, what if he doesn’t even listen to me,’ the voice said trailing off into sobs again. ‘I know I’ve never been your favorite person, but I really to talk to him, okay. Please, I would never ask…I just…I need to explain…I freaked out and I didn’t even fully realize what I was doing. I mean, it was me, but it wasn’t really me…and now I can never take it back. Oh God, what have I done?’ the alarm in Amanda’s tone of voice rising as the consequences of her actions began to sink in. ‘I threw away the best thing that ever happened to me!’ the voice trailed off once again, giving way to loud choking sobs. *Beep* ‘Someone up there must hate me,’ she mumbled to herself as she walked out of the bathroom, and back into her tastefully decorated master bedroom, ‘as if this day hasn’t been long enough and now I have to deal with the overemotional psycho.’ ‘Okay, maybe that was a little harsh,’ she thought as she continued towards the phone, and dialing Jason’s cell phone number. After. His voice is higher than I expected; higher than mine.“Hm?”“It’s perfect,” he says.I stand in the aisle and look at him.He sits by the window on one of those four-person arrangements where two seats face each other. Close up I see he is literally twice my size. Given how small and slender I am, it amazes me how I instigate these situations with bull men who could rip me apart if they wanted.Perhaps I secretly want that too.I move closer. He glances at my boots, then looks straight ahead again. Slowly, I extend my hand towards him. He clutches his can tighter. My hands are the only part of me that’s bigger than anything on him. I extend a long finger with a red-lacquered nail until it taps the side of the tin.“May I?” I whisper.“I had a cold. Don’t want you getting it.”“I’m so sorry to hear that. When was this?”“Week before last.”“Are you quite recovered?”“Probably.”I leave my nail pressed against the can. He snorts in a way that might indicate laughter and inclines the can to me. I.
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