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His nurse asked, “What’s so funny?”The doctor replies, “You need to go in and see this old guy. He has his girlfriend’s name, ‘Tina’ tattooed on his pecker.”So the nurse decides to go check it out. A while later she comes out of the exam room and tells the doctor, “You were mistaken about him. He doesn’t have his girlfriend’s name tattooed on his equipment, he has his ship’s name tattooed on it. The Ticonderoga!”These are compliments of Andrew B.A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.The man says: “I’m sending out one thousand Valentine cards signed: ‘Guess who?’”“But why?” asks the man.“I’m a divorce lawyer.” the man replies.You may have heard about the Southern. The huge circular fan I needed to keep me cool was blowing creases in my expensive glass.“Leave it. Come on.”“This is a boat,” he said ... not that a pile of wood and a bunch of bulk ‘glass, resin and hardener looked like a boat. Eventually ... it did ... it even sailed off to a showroom somewhere up north and they tell me it sold.I worked on it ... let the buyer beware!I learned that short pieces of ‘glass over lapped worked much better than trying to work a huge piece before the resin fired off ... hardened.I learned that hardener stinks and is bad for my lungs. Paper masks don’t work. I needed a 3M filtered face mask. He opened a new box and fitted it to me.I learned that a circular cutoff saw makes precise cuts and is quicker than a hand saw.When the owner saw I was getting the idea, he put me on an apprenticeship and I got paid. I also got my little shop corner free and a month knocked off my slip rent.I learned that big boats never seem to end.When my day on the mold was done I.
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